At times this little voice can actually be helpful and keep us motivated toward goals—like when it reminds us that what we’re about to eat isn’t healthy or what we’re about to do may not be wise. However, this voice can often be more harmful than helpful.

This statement show negative thoughts can grow and become self-defeating:

“I didn’t say the right thing at work today. I never say the right thing. Everyone hates me. No wonder I can’t make friends. I’ll never have friends.”

Focusing on negative thoughts may lead to decreased motivation as well as greater feelings of helplessness and sometimes depression. For some people it also contributes to their sexual offending as they use it to justify negative behaviours, so it’s definitely something to fix. 

Some examples of negative self-talk include: 

• I fail at everything I do so why bother
• What's the point. No one cares about me anyway.
• I am bound to get it wrong