Self-help, information and support for those concerned about their inappropriate thoughts or behaviour.
Information and support for those concerned about the behaviour of another adult or those concerned about a child or young persons behaviour or wellbeing.
We offer professionals practical advice, training resources, and support tools to help them recognise, prevent, and respond to child safety concerns effectively.
We can support anyone with a concern about child sexual abuse and its prevention via our self-help resources, programmes and helpline.
As a charity, we rely on the kindness and generosity of people like you to support our vital work to prevent child sexual abuse. And right now, we need your help more than ever.
By donating, fundraising, or simply spreading the word about our work, your support will have a huge impact.
Self help modules:
This module will help you understand the false justifications offenders use to avoid responsibility for their actions.
Home Concerned about your own thoughts or behaviour? Concerned about your online behaviour Images are children
This module will help you understand:
It’s likely that you will have used self-justifications to persuade yourself that it is ok to allow yourself to view sexual images of children.
Self-justification describes how, when a person encounters a situation in which their behaviour is inconsistent with their beliefs, that person tends to justify the behaviour to allow themselves to continue what they are doing.
At first you might be aware that you are using self-justifications to let yourself look at illegal images. But your awareness of these justifications might fade over time the more they are used.
Using the table below, write down your current level of knowledge and understanding about your awareness of the child abuse taking place in these images (1 = very little understanding; 2 = some understanding; 3 = secure understanding).
I understand how illegal images victimise children. | 1 | 2 | 3 |
I understand justifications I have used to allow myself to continue offending online. | 1 | 2 | 3 |
I understand the effects of being photographed on the child in the image. | 1 | 2 | 3 |
Regardless of where you have scored yourself, it is important to work through the material in this module. We find that if people accept the reality of the harm caused to children, then they are less likely to continue with their illegal online behaviour.
For people to allow themselves to view sexual images of children, they will generally be using a number of self-justifications to persuade themselves that it is ok to do what they are doing.
This process is called ‘self-talk’. Self-talk is the internal argument someone uses to give themselves permission to do something they know they shouldn’t be doing.
Here’s an example:
People will be persuaded by the self-talk process if their ‘yes’ justifications in favour of doing the behaviour are stronger than their ‘no’ arguments against the behaviour.
By being aware of the self-talk process you go through, and the negative effects of offending for yourself and others, you will increase your ability and motivation to avoid further offending.
This film includes some of the justifications that people use to allow themselves to continue offending online.
In the box below, the left hand side column contains some self-talk justifications you might have used to justify your use of sexual images of children. In the right hand side column list self-talk statements which you could use in response to the matching justification to dissuade yourself from engaging in the behaviour.
Please add at the bottom of the table any additional self-talk justifications that you use, along with a matching response. You should repeat all the phrases you write in the responses column in your head, so that this sort of thinking becomes automatic if you start to use the justifications.
There is an example provided.
Justifications | Responses |
“I am only looking at pictures.” | “The children in the images are real children who are being sexually abused.” |
“The images were already online.” | |
“I did not directly abuse the child in the image.” | |
“The child in the image is smiling, so they must be enjoying it.” | |
“I didn’t produce the pictures, and they were already there.” | |
“I’ve had no direct contact with the child.” | |
“The children are clothed, so these images cannot be illegal.” | |
“This isn’t abuse because no adults are in the images.” | |
“The child took this photograph of themselves.” |
‘Consent’ means to give permission for something to happen. It is important for us to consider the issue of consent when we are talking about the children in the images because children are not able to consent to sexual activity.
The following video gives one man’s experience of coming to terms with the harm that this behaviour can cause to the children in the images.
Children are not able to give consent because they can not fully understand what they are consenting to, or the emotional impact and consequences of sex.
Adults are generally able to give informed consent about sexual activity and photographs of them, unless they are under the influence of alcohol or drugs or have some kind of vulnerability.
Some people disagree about the age that children are mature enough to be able to give this permission. In the UK the age of consent for sexual activity is 16 years old. But any sexual picture of a child under 18 years old is illegal.
Children are not able to give consent to engage in sexual activity, and consent is further taken away from children when sexual images of them are taken and posted on the internet. Once an image is posted online, all control is lost over that image. The victim will experience further abuse with the knowledge that their picture is out there, being shared, and viewed, beyond their control.
Consent is further removed from children if there is a power difference between them and the person who is inciting sexual activity. It is not uncommon for children to be sexually exploited as a part of the process of producing illegal images – for example, by receiving gifts, drugs, affection or accommodation – in exchange for engaging in sexual activity.
Sometimes pictures are taken of children without them knowing – for example, at the beach – and sometimes pictures are taken with the child’s knowledge. Sometimes a child will be coerced into taking and posting an image of themselves, without fully realising the consequences of doing this.
As part of this module in helping you recognise and acknowledge that the children in the images are real children, it is helpful – although difficult – to get yourself to think about how that child got to be in that situation of being in front of that camera. This is what we will be asking you to consider in the following exercise.
‘Empathy’ means trying to understand what another person is thinking and feeling, or “putting yourself into their shoes”.
It means having insight at an emotional level as to what it would feel like to be that person.
We generally find it harder to empathise or identify with other people who are “not like us”. For many people looking at illegal images on the internet, the ability to empathise is difficult because you cannot identify with any one child. A child in an image can be seen as being “far removed” from the person looking at images of this child online. This may be because of the physical distance created by the computer screen, or because the child is unlike the individual looking at the image. The child may be underprivileged, isolated or without a voice, they may be an orphan, or in care, or being controlled by an abusive family. This means it is harder for the person looking at the image to feel empathy for the victim in the image. This exercise is designed to help you “get to know” the human being behind the photograph with his/her own thoughts, feelings, problems, and life.
This exercise is challenging and emotionally demanding.
It is important that you take a break during this exercise if you feel you need to. Consider self-care, such as having someone you can talk to if you are feeling emotional afterwards or making sure that you have something nice planned to do. Remember negative mood states often put you at risk of further offending.
Having completed this exercise, read the next section to find out what is actually known about the effects of being photographed.
Psychologists have tried to look at what it means to the child to be photographed and for these photographs to be used in a sexual way (e.g. fantasy and/or masturbation etc.).
While it is convenient to think about photography as being separate from the actual abuse, for the majority of children this is not the case. Very often being photographed is PART OF the abuse; victims see the lasting photographical evidence as a continuation of the abuse they experienced.
Knowing that images of them are circulating on the web, and that strangers use these photographs for inappropriate sexual purposes, causes ongoing victimisation for the children involved.
Before continuing, you might find it helpful to view this short video clip of an individual explaining his realisation of the harm to children, as a result of his own online behaviour.
Abuse can produce physical symptoms, such as urinary infections and soreness around the genitalia or anus, headaches and vomiting. Depression, tiredness, difficulties in concentrating and nightmares are also common in such children. It can also lead to other problems, such as the child behaving or talking in a sexual way, acting out or behaving aggressively, as well as impacting on their relationships with other children and adult relationships when they are older.
As with all forms of sexual abuse, children are reluctant to talk about what has happened. This may be very convenient for the adults involved, but increases the chance that the child will have problems in the future, such as depression or inability to form trusting or loving relationships with other adults. When the abuse is photographed, this seems to increase the child’s fear of talking about what has happened. Disclosures, when eventually made, are often limited, with the child only telling as much as they feel the person questioning them already knows. Feelings of shame, humiliation and helplessness are often accompanied by feelings of anxiety, with the child worried that the photograph may be viewed as evidence of co-operation on their part. The child may also feel that the fact that they were smiling may be seen as evidence that he or she was enjoying the experience when they were being coerced or forced to smile.
As with the introduction to this module, using the table below, write down your level of knowledge and understanding around your awareness of the child abuse taking place in these images (1 = very little knowledge; 2 = some understanding; 3 = secure understanding).
I understand how illegal images victimise children. | 1 | 2 | 3 |
I understand justifications I have used to allow myself to continue offending online. | 1 | 2 | 3 |
I understand the effects of being photographed on the child in the image. | 1 | 2 | 3 |
You can use our helpline, live chat or secure message service for confidential support from our experienced advisors if you want to discuss anything covered in this module, have struggled when working through it, or want to go through the information with a practitioner to guide you.
Do you have a couple of minutes to tell us how you found the module you have just read through?
Please take this shore anonymous survey and let us know what you think.
Many people who have engaged in online sexual behaviour involving children believe that there is a ‘grey area’ between what is legal and illegal. There is not.
This module will help you explore and understand your current sexual and non-sexual fantasies, and the link between your fantasies and your online behaviour
If you are concerned about your worrying or illegal online sexual behaviour and want to stop this behaviour, it is important for you to learn as much as possible about yourself and what you are doing.
This module aims to help you explore and gain understanding your level of control over your current online sexual behaviours, how you have used denial to allow your problematic behaviour to continue and how to make immediate changes to start the change process.
Sexual offending happens in the offline and online world. But some people we work with often tell us they would not have offended without the internet, apps or smartphones.
This module will help you understand, different types of triggers and your own triggers
If you are viewing legal adult pornography then this is your choice and we are not here to shame you for using it or to tell you to stop. But this self-help section will encourage you to think about whether viewing legal adult pornography is helpful or harmful for you.
This module aims to help you explore and gain understanding of how you can start to address your addictions.
This module aims to help you explore and gain understanding of your motivation for engaging sexually with children online, how your behaviour progressed into sexual communication and how you might have justified your behaviour.
This module will help you understand the false justifications offenders use to avoid responsibility for their actions, that these images are of real children being abused and the effects of being photographed on the children in the image.
This module aims to help you to explore and gain understanding of why you collect, how it links to your offending and the relationship between collecting and some of the unsatisfactory aspects of your life.
This module aims to help you explore and gain understanding of why immediate gratification is so powerful and how to manage the desire of immediate gratification.
Our confidential helpline is free and available to anyone concerned about the safety of children.
Lucy Faithfull Foundation offers support and advice for parents, carers, professionals, survivors and communities. Shore is for teenagers worried about sexual behaviour.
Our helpline 0808 1000 900
2 Birch House, Harris Business Park, Hanbury Road
Stoke Prior, Bromsgrove, B60 4DJ
Lucy Faithfull Foundation is a Registered Charity No. 1013025, and is a company limited by guarantee, Registered in England No. 2729957.
Self-help, information and support for those concerned about their inappropriate thoughts or behaviour.
Information and support for those concerned about the behaviour of another adult or those concerned about a child or young persons behaviour or wellbeing.
We offer professionals practical advice, training resources, and support tools to help them recognise, prevent, and respond to child safety concerns effectively.
We can support anyone with a concern about child sexual abuse and its prevention via our self-help resources, programmes and helpline.
As a charity, we rely on the kindness and generosity of people like you to support our vital work to prevent child sexual abuse. And right now, we need your help more than ever.
By donating, fundraising, or simply spreading the word about our work, your support will have a huge impact.
As you may have noticed, our website looks a little different now. We’ve restructured and redesigned the site to be more accessible to you, so we’d love to know what you think. All feedback will remain anonymous; we do not collect any personal identifying information.