Self-help, information and support for those concerned about their inappropriate thoughts or behaviour.
Information and support for those concerned about the behaviour of another adult or those concerned about a child or young persons behaviour or wellbeing.
We offer professionals practical advice, training resources, and support tools to help them recognise, prevent, and respond to child safety concerns effectively.
We can support anyone with a concern about child sexual abuse and its prevention via our self-help resources, programmes and helpline.
As a charity, we rely on the kindness and generosity of people like you to support our vital work to prevent child sexual abuse. And right now, we need your help more than ever.
By donating, fundraising, or simply spreading the word about our work, your support will have a huge impact.
Self help modules:
This module aims to help you explore and gain understanding of:
Home Concerned about your own thoughts or behaviour? Concerned about your thoughts or behaviour? Problem of immediate gratification
This module aims to help you explore and gain understanding of:
If you have been masturbating to fantasies about engaging in sexual acts with children, or if you have taken these thoughts further and engaged in sexual offending against children, then you might be wondering why you choose behaviours with such short-term gain when they have such long term negative consequences.
The following list offers some explanations for this:
This still might not help you to understand why you started having sexual thoughts of children and certainly does not excuse abusive behaviour; however it can help you understand why you prioritised your immediate needs despite the consequences. It is important that you start to think about how you can reduce the power of instant gratification if this has been a particular problem for you.
One way to counter the power of instant gratification is to think about how you will feel if you do the behaviour, compared to how you feel if you don’t (e.g. you distract yourself from your sexual urges and instead find a book to read and go for a walk). How would you feel after an hour, a week and a month?
Another is to write a list of the costs (what you lose or may lose from doing the behaviour) and the gains (what you gain or may gain from doing the behaviour). These can also be split into short term and long term costs and gains. The table below shows some examples.
This still might not help you understand why you chose to behave illegally online does not excuse the behaviour. But it can help you understand why you prioritised your short-term needs despite the consequences.
It is important that you start to think about how you can reduce the power of instant gratification if this has been a particular problem for you.
Costs | Gains | ||
Short Term | Long Term | Short Term | Long Term |
Shame | Lose relationship | Sexual relief | |
Guilt | Lose job | ||
Fear | Depression |
Very few people can identify long term gains from their behaviour – this shows how powerful the urge for sexual relief can be in the moment. But it can also show why they want to stop their negative behaviour.
Self-help, information and support for people troubled by their sexual thoughts about children and young people.
This module aims to help you explore and gain understanding of:
This module will help you to explore, different types of triggers, your own triggers, potential warning signs of sexual abuse, including grooming and situational and environmental risks.
This module aims to help you explore and gain understanding of Immediate changes to help you take control of your behaviour How you may have used justifications to allow your problematic behaviour(s) to continue
This module will help you explore and understand your current sexual and non-sexual fantasies, and the link between your fantasies and your online behaviour
This section is designed to help you explain terminology around unusual sexual interests (paraphilias) and learn how to lead a healthy life with these interests.
This module aims to help you explore and gain understanding of problematic sexual behaviours, motivations, patterns and trends.
Our confidential helpline is free and available to anyone concerned about the safety of children.
Lucy Faithfull Foundation offers support and advice for parents, carers, professionals, survivors and communities. Shore is for teenagers worried about sexual behaviour.
Our helpline 0808 1000 900
2 Birch House, Harris Business Park, Hanbury Road
Stoke Prior, Bromsgrove, B60 4DJ
Lucy Faithfull Foundation is a Registered Charity No. 1013025, and is a company limited by guarantee, Registered in England No. 2729957.
Self-help, information and support for those concerned about their inappropriate thoughts or behaviour.
Information and support for those concerned about the behaviour of another adult or those concerned about a child or young persons behaviour or wellbeing.
We offer professionals practical advice, training resources, and support tools to help them recognise, prevent, and respond to child safety concerns effectively.
We can support anyone with a concern about child sexual abuse and its prevention via our self-help resources, programmes and helpline.
As a charity, we rely on the kindness and generosity of people like you to support our vital work to prevent child sexual abuse. And right now, we need your help more than ever.
By donating, fundraising, or simply spreading the word about our work, your support will have a huge impact.